Tag Archives: the fuck is this the fuck was that

The Terror by Dan Simmons, Read by John Lee

The TerrorThe Terror by Dan Simmons
My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars

It is not beyond the realm of possibility that this book would have waited from being finished in February to being reviewed in July even had my year not been inhumanely busy. Despite the disgustingly hot weather, I have goose bumps thinking about it.

The Terror is taken from the name one half of a pair of ships sent on an Arctic expedition at some point when reinforcement technology for ice breaking ships still involved the types of wood used in conjunction with some iron. Near the beginning a character thinks to himself that the number of awards given to the returning commanders of these expeditions seems to be higher the more lives are lost. I’m inclined to agree.

This book was dark, dirty, and above all cold. To steal from the inimitable karen’s review, “oh my god, let me never get scurvy.” There are many things I could add to that list. I have no idea how realistic it may be, but the descriptions of the conditions experienced by the people on those ships make me wish I could forget hearing them.

Sadly, I feel the same way about much of the element of this book that throws it into the fantasy heap. It somehow went from a scary thing that could have been made frightening to a rather campy and eventually lame rehashing of a mythology that I suspect is nowhere near as simplistic as it seems. The last 10 or so chapters could have been left off the book. More HMS Terror and less of the Terror would have made this a far better book.

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Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by JK Rowling (Harry Potter #7)

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Harry Potter, #7)Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
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Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was better than Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. Coming from me, that pretty much falls into the “damning with faint praise” category. There were some parts of this book I really enjoyed, especially some of the character development with the Weasley kids. Overall though…well, if you don’t mind obscenities or spoilers, my complete thoughts are in the rant below.
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Lists: Worst Books Read in 2011 – # 1

Worst Books Read in 2011

1. Tomato Rhapsody: A Novel of Love, Lust, and Forbidden Fruit by Adam Schnell

Recipe for Worst Book Read in 2011

Take rhyming dialog and mix with a terrible author. Add in a small, prejudiced town in stereotyped Italy. Throw in a priest who’s been dyed eggplant and many statements regarding his being incredibly well hung, a couple of brainless teenagers, and some sex in a cauldron of tomatoes. Next time you want to be grossed out and cringing at the thought of acid on sensitive body parts, just pick up this book.

Original Review
My friend Ala also endured the horror. His review managed to be very funny & still a needed release after slugging through that schlock.

2. Dearly, Departed by Lia Habel
3. Sequence by Adrian Dawson
4. Leaving Atocha Station by Ben Lerner
5. The Man Who Couldn’t Eat by Jon Reiner
6. Boneshaker by Cherie Priest
7. Stolen World by Jennie Erin Smith
8. The Black Company by Glen Cook
9. A Visit From the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan
10. The Suspicions of Mr. Whicher by Kate Summerscale


Lists: Worst Books Read in 2011 – # 3

Worst Books Read in 2011

3. Sequence by Adrian Dawson

To quote myself, boring and an affront to scientists everywhere.

Original Review

4. Leaving Atocha Station by Ben Lerner
5. The Man Who Couldn’t Eat by Jon Reiner
6. Boneshaker by Cherie Priest
7. Stolen World by Jennie Erin Smith
8. The Black Company by Glen Cook
9. A Visit From the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan
10. The Suspicions of Mr. Whicher by Kate Summerscale


Lists: Best Books Read in 2011 – # 8

Best Books Read in 2011

8. Leviathan Wakes by James S.A. Corey

Leviathan Wakes is an absolutely fantastic science fiction novel. I was skeptical when I read the description, but emerged a true believer. Without doubt the best scifi of many I read this year, and one of the best out of 200 books overall.

Original Review

9. A Great & Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray
10. The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett


Lists: Worst Books Read in 2011 – # 8

Worst Books Read in 2011

8. The Black Company by Glen Cook

As I suspected at the time, The Black Company proved utterly forgettable. I also hated the naming convention and it felt like I was reading an idea for a book rather than the book itself.

Also, the big, bad wizard people had flying carpets. Seriously. Shame on you, Glen Cook. Shame on you.

Original Review

9. A Visit From the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan
10. The Suspicions of Mr. Whicher by Kate Summerscale


Review: John Dies at the End

John Dies at the EndJohn Dies at the End by David Wong
My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars

Warning: This Book Contains Multiple Scenes With Disgusting Huge Spiders

*ahem*

I had avoided adding John Dies at the End until a friend roped me into it through a challenge. I have to say, it was a pleasant surprise. Well, maybe not pleasant. That’s not a word that describes, well, anything in this book.

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Review: Blameless

Blameless (The Parasol Protectorate, #3)Blameless by Gail Carriger
My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars

I don’t know quite how I would explain why I love Gail Carriger‘s Parasol Protectorate series so much, but I really do. While not so good as the others, Blameless has that same mixture of wit and “d’aww” reaction that I enjoyed in the previous books. As always, Alexia is involved in crazy adventures and Conall rages about wildly. Well, that isn’t all, but it does take up a fair amount. Basically, I continue to recommend these books to those who like Regency romances, even though these are set in Victorian times, as well as those who like light urban fantasy. There’s a little something for everyone here. For me, it’s on to Heartless! (Oh yes, ladybugs and pesto both play major roles in this. What’s not to love?)

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Review: Changeless

Changeless (Parasol Protectorate, #2)Changeless by Gail Carriger
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

While not quite as good as Soulless, Changeless was a delightful read and exactly what I needed to cleanse my brain after reading American Psycho. Gail Carriger writes good, funny yarns. There is a definite amount of repetition, but it can be forgiven. I can’t bring myself to say that her stories and characters are original, but there is a certain freshness to her stories. Perhaps it is the way her points of view are written or the very, very mild inclusion of a few steampunk elements. Regardless, I look forward to continuing the series. I mean, how often are Victorian romances & fantasy mixed without being tedious? Not often enough, I say.

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Review: American Psycho

American PsychoAmerican Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Well, I have now read American Psycho. I now feel completely justified in my previous suspicion that Bret Easton Ellis is not the author for me. Oh, when it isn’t taking itself seriously, the book is very well-written. Even the originally incredibly irritating repetitive detailing of brand names and prices and food became a part of the rhythm of the book in a way I was not expecting. Patrick Bateman is certainly a psychopath, whether his crimes are only in his head or real. With all of these things though, I would still love to give this one star. The reason it gets three is because of the way a consistent crawling horror was maintained. There was no respite, even in the seemingly innocuous sections. This takes talent. I still found it anything but enjoyable, and towards the end became annoyed when Ellis tried to make it somehow meaningful in a greater sense. Oh, and it’s certainly gory in every sense of the word, in case there was someone who missed that. I need a stiff drink now.

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